seeing sadness

by Yas Jayson Friday, December 05, 2014 2 palagay everyday witness people are people

photograbbed.

Ryan is a boy I dated last year. From the moment I talked with him online, I knew that he is special. He thought I was special too.

We went to Baguio together for his birthday which after a week, I took courage to tell him that I still have feelings for Baabaa.

Fast forward and some intense confrontations after, we became friends. We would meet from time to time to check on each other's welfare, how his professional career as a very accomplished architect is keeping up, about my work, the boys we dated, the things he love most like djembe and ukelele.

Just this afternoon, we met. Starbucks in Makati is as convenient as a sari-sari store you can find it in every corner with all the coffees you can drink. He told me about this boy he's dating and his plan of going to some music festival in Zambales tonight with him. He's about to pop the question.

Elias, I think he is the one. I'm happy and contented when I am with him he would say one night, when it was my turn to tell him about my failed attempt with a chemist.

So I asked what would he ask him. Will you be my forever? he said. But there is sadness in his voice.

It's a make or break, Elias. I think he turned cold and annoyed these past few weeks. I would find it hard at times just to ask him out. Then there are subtweets during days that we would not speak. But he has to make the trip nevertheless.

This is a boy who wears his heart on his sleeve. I know if he is happy because his eyes would sparkle when he speaks and I know that today, no amount of jokes or warm hugs can satisfy that unnerving sadness in his voice. No, not even a highly commercialised macchiato.

I could only hope for the trip to turn out well. Then I will be in peace knowing everything has a good end in the hands of God.